IF you could see me wandering up through the graveyard about half six, on a filthy wet dark morning, sleet lashing in sideways from somewhere north of Siberia, muffled in the Cherub's woolly hat and wellies (he's outgrown them, I haven't..) you'd see where I was coming from here.

I am dealing with it you know, the cold, the dark, the leaking windows, the boiler that's re-defining temperamental. And this isn't a whinge, it's just a flat declaration - look some one else is living my life.

Boden catalogue Summer 2010.
This does not look like a couple unduly bothered by the small print on their Scottish Gas Boiler Maintenance Contract does it?

Sensible self - You want to live in a Boden catalogue, Macy???
Frankly wee Sensibles I can think of worse places

But picking on Boden is unfair. One catalogue does not an entire winter of discontent make.
Check out Living Magazine why don't you?
Clever Eilis and Tom have converted their five bedroom holiday home in Dorset to reflect the tranquillity of their surroundings...
She used to be a hat designer you know..
And now their holiday home has 5 bedrooms. Count them. FIVE.

Sensible Self - That's a lot of cleaning.

DO hat designers clean??
Sensible Self - No need to be nippy about our friends who are Artists in Felt.

Keith and Dora's apartment is in Italy. He loves to paint the nearby Santa Maria di Miraculi.

Sensible Self: So what you're saying Macy is that these people have stolen your life??

Well not all of them obviously, but you know something's gone wrong somewhere.
I passed all the exams they threw at me
I worked overtime
I paid into the pension fund
I've been good for years on end now.
Dammit - I can design hats!

Questions need to be asked.
That's all I'm saying.

I'd like my real life back please.