Sunday afternoon and June the hospice nurse has had to sit me down in the relatives room.

Macy, we're going to get a doctor to check him out. We'll hold off until she's run some tests..
Did you see if there were any tremors at all? Yes....
And has he been sleeping most of the day?

You know I don't think you should take him home tonight. I know he wants to go, but what if you found yourself on your own? and all that panic?

We need to keep him tonight and see how he gets on.

It looks like he's got an infection.

What's happened is that he's got very toxic drugs, and these have built up in him. He needs liquids and to be monitored here.
I don't think he should go home, even if you do feel like you can cope.

You know, he's a young man, sometimes they can bounce back for a wee while.
But they have such low immune systems....sometimes it is a tummy bug, or some other wee thing..


(Holds both my hands) Was it very scary for you?

Me (welling up) no..no ...it was just ... nice... having him home.