Over at the Extremely Eminent and Respectable Institute of Edinburgh (EERIE), we are a group of highly educated people, who adhere to the strictest codes of confidentiality and professionalism in all that we do.
Except when it comes to payroll.
Our payroll is run in -house by the twinkly, gregarious, ever fragrant Kurt.
Whoever decided that Kurt was the person to run the in house payroll was obviously having an off day as far as adhering to strictest codes and etc. was concerned. The decision having been made though, presumably he remains posting salaries since the alternative would be to upset him.
They haven't noticed he's already upset.
There's only so long I can ignore the theatrical sighs and shuffling of paper at the next desk
........ what's up?
Oh nothing...just going through this shit about the pay rise....
??? Pay rise???? What pay rise??
Oh just the wee 4 per cent pay rise for managers....
Managers get 4%???
Mmmm hmmmm
We get 1.5 and they get 4%???
Oh unless you're a director - (passing over the spreadsheet) how'd you like that for Christmas??
Great, now we're all upset.
Except when it comes to payroll.
Our payroll is run in -house by the twinkly, gregarious, ever fragrant Kurt.
Whoever decided that Kurt was the person to run the in house payroll was obviously having an off day as far as adhering to strictest codes and etc. was concerned. The decision having been made though, presumably he remains posting salaries since the alternative would be to upset him.
They haven't noticed he's already upset.
There's only so long I can ignore the theatrical sighs and shuffling of paper at the next desk
........ what's up?
Oh nothing...just going through this shit about the pay rise....
??? Pay rise???? What pay rise??
Oh just the wee 4 per cent pay rise for managers....
Managers get 4%???
Mmmm hmmmm
We get 1.5 and they get 4%???
Oh unless you're a director - (passing over the spreadsheet) how'd you like that for Christmas??
Great, now we're all upset.
5 April 2011 at 22:50
Biotch!
(THEM getting a bigger pay rise I mean, not Kurt!) :¬)
xxx
5 April 2011 at 23:39
Hahaha, oh god. It's always the same way. Stupid higher ups get the big money while the minions work harder for less. I say you boycott work and come drink cocktails with me. :)
6 April 2011 at 07:11
Maps - Don't even get me started on the bonuses....
Ms Veg - Ha yes alcohol! Think management should be buying a round though...
6 April 2011 at 10:02
I'm very surprised as Scottish Bankers have such a reputation for probity and moderation.
I could say more but am restrained by a super injunction....
6 April 2011 at 11:36
I wouldn't like that one little bit!
6 April 2011 at 14:15
How about sacking all the managers, and using the extra money to give the minions a 5 per cent rise? Funny how managers' salaries just keep soaring upwards while the rest of us get the crumbs that are left over.
6 April 2011 at 18:29
Rog - Some sense stops me from printing the full payroll.... but they're not even bankers!
Pat - It is incredibly demotivating funnily enough.
Nick - Absolutely - If they'd shared the total payroll increase evenly us minions would have had a 3% pay rise.
7 April 2011 at 07:25
Apparently there was some sort of train made of gravy and I didn't get on it.....just have to keep slogging on.
8 April 2011 at 13:50
I almost feel comfortable that there are rules for my superanuation, that then pay an indexation increase every 6 months.
A lot better than an enterprise bargaining agreement over three years that took two years to negotiate-- while the executive are tied to some parliamentary award that seems to increase at will
8 April 2011 at 21:01
*opens a bottle of white wine*
Here you go honey.
This will help.
(Actually, it won't, but I hate drinking on my own).
3 May 2011 at 21:47
Please tell me that you all got up and did a Glee club version of "Take This Job and Shove It."